50. David Bazan - “Oblivion”

This jam takes place within the fuzzy head space of self-destruction. It’s looking through the lens of metacongition and recognizing that something is amiss, and yet at the same time feeling powerless to correct it. The ineptitude haunts you, always lurking over your shoulder, taunting you and continuously reminding you of everything you should be and everything you’re not.

It’s the smothering hug of oblivion and it manifests itself in many ways. It’s reaching for the bottle as the morning sunlight creeps through your crusted eyes and into your already drunken mind, or the the dry smoke rasping through your throat even as coughs punctuate every breath. It’s living life full of regret and surrender. It’s the mid (and even quarter) life crisis weighing your worth as it worries about the future and criticizes the present. It’s life perched atop your soul, crushing you, vacating every last breath of hope you once possessed. It’s realizing that you are indeed mortal and that life is indeed concrete and real. All the dreams and expectations you once had are drying up, cracking loose, and showing themselves to be nothing but a facade of ill-supported optimism. You’re running out of time, and nowhere near where you once expected to be. Life is expiring, and sadly so are you.